I’m sure they’re well meaning. I’m sure they’re trying to sympathize.
But people just don’t get true sleep deprivation.
Chronic sleep deprivation is diabolical torture for the body, mind and soul. I wish I were exaggerating. My oldest woke up every 30 mins and would scream even after I nursed him. My middle refused to sleep anywhere but on me. My third, well he wants to be just like his brothers and thinks two ten minute naps can carry him through the day.
Besides the mind numbing exhaustion, lack of sleep has caused me to be a little, well, volatile. Whenever I tell someone about the war raging at my house, folks think they need to offer their two cents. And my usually patient self just can’t take it.
So to all the moms that are in the foxhole with me: this one’s for you.
Things Tired New Moms Don’t Want to Hear:
- “My baby slept through the night at 6 weeks.” Well isn’t that just dandy for you.
- “Can’t you just let them cry?” Um, that’s kinda the problem. My kid is howling in the middle of the night like a wild banshee, hence the no sleep issue.
- “I need at least 8 hours of sleep to function.” And I need at least 8 hours of sleep to have the self control to not ninja kick you. You’ve been warned.
- “I remember pulling all-nighters in college.” Now try doing it for five years straight while covered in bodily fluids.
- “Cherish Every Moment.” Shut up.
- “Have you tried swaddling?” If one more person asks me that, I’ll put them in a straight jacket!
- “Have you tried a calming bedtime routine?” Yes, everything is very calm until the screaming commences.
- “Have you tried teething tablets?” I have tried everything. Essential oils, changing my diet, special music, and we’ve got the credit card bill to prove it.
- “My kid woke up once last night too.” ONCE!?! I can’t even imagine the bliss!
- “WWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHhhaaaaaaa!” Like nails on the chalkboard of my soul.
And the only thing we want to hear, “That sucks. Let me hold him while you take a nap.”
(Struggling with Post Partum Depression? I’ve been there/am there. THREE TIMES! Find some hope in my story of battling PPD.)
Oh, I just have to say this is the best title of a post ever – and the post itself didn’t disappoint either! LOL – these are just so true they’re hilarious!
Oh Emma, that is high praise coming from a blogger as great as yourself. Thank you! Glad it made you chuckle!
I feel your pain on all of them! My LO is like your middle child ( only likes to sleep on me). I laughed so hard when you mentioned the swaddling comment. My husband calls it a baby straight jacket lol
So glad I’m not alone. Though it’s not a fun place to be!