The nurse would call. I’d fall to my knees as tears of joy streamed down my face. The weight would lift.

Christmas would be a time of glorious celebration, full of thankfulness and family.

I’d write a happy post about all the lovely things God taught us during this year of waiting.

His birthmark would always be this visual reminder to me of what could have been.

Except what could have been, is.

My son has Sturge Weber Syndrome.

A Diagnosis

It was the doctor that called.

I tried to tell myself that it was him calling because I had left an impatient message on his machine earlier in the day. He told me that the MRI revealed four lesions on our little boy’s brain. These lesions will eventually bleed and cause seizures and possibly strokes.

Sturge Weber Syndrome looks different with every individual and it’s so rare that there doesn’t seem to be two doctors that agree on anything.

Some children have so many seizures and strokes that they need to have the halves of their brain separated to even survive. Some never walk and talk. Some have debilitating migraines, some go blind, most have learning disabilities.

And every milestone they achieve can be taken away at any moment by another seizure or stroke. It’s progressive and it’s vicious.

We’re left with no cure and no clue.

(Photo credit Kelly Wendt)

A Dream

I’ve been writing a journal to each of my boys since before their conception.

(Alright, alright. Our middle son was a surprise, so I had to play a little catch up in his journal!)

In them, I share my hopes, dreams and prayers for each child, as well as sweet moments that I want to treasure forever.

Because of my son’s birthmark, I knew he would know what it’s like to be different, to be judge, and unfortunately, to feel rejected. But I’ve always prayed that God would use that pain to draw T. J. to the unconditional love of Jesus. And that he would, in turn, share that love in tangible ways with others.

I pictured him caring for the outcasts, serving the lowly, touching the untouchables. I pictured him as a man of unassailable character that wouldn’t be afraid of what others thought or care if anyone took notice his efforts. I pictured him and his future wife raising a family of compassionate children that would turn the world on its head.

I didn’t picture him with Sturge Weber syndrome. 

And even now, I still can’t. Maybe it’s denial, but mostly it’s because I just don’t know WHAT to grieve over.

It’s so weird to have no idea if my son will ever be able to have a conversation with me. And to know that all the abilities he does have could be snatched away without warning. Everything is so fragile and fleeting.

An Advent

This all happened the week before Christmas.

Our Christmas was not jolly or magical or merry.

When we first found out that SWS was a possibility a year ago, I wrote about my struggle to trust God’s goodness, no matter the outcome.

(T.J. less than three minutes old.)

I was trying to hold fast to the truth that God has entered into a covenant with me, one that promises to work everything out for my good.

Not the kind of “good” that promises an easy, pain-free life.

I knew that. But I knew that even when tragedy strikes, as a child of God, that that circumstance is truly what was best. I didn’t know how that all worked out, but I was willing to rest in that paradox.

Well, here we are.

Our hearts are broken. The tears flow freely, even in the Target parking lot. I wake up countless times a night with the ice cold terror of the unknown.

So is this good? When the doctor called, did we get “good” news. 

Here’s why I say, with trembling lips, “YES”.

Because God is with me. He is so very present with me in this pain. He is not far off. He is not a theory, an idea, a religion.

He is my God, my Father, my Savior, my Friend. And he’s here.

Christmas was a celebration that God is with us. He left perfection and peace to enter into the hell that is this life. His advent, his coming, is the only reason my family has hope. And we long for his second advent when he makes all things new.

The psalmist had a similar crisis of heart in Psalm 73. He raged that evil people seemed to have nothing but happiness while folks of character suffered through life. The unasked question is, “Is God really good to me?”

Eventually Asaph declares,

He has it all planned out. 

Want to BE the GOOD?

As we go to tons of doctors and try and formulate a medical strategy, we’ve mostly been told that we have to wait and see.

Well, I don’t want to sit around doing nothing. When I’m hurting, I’ve been taught to serve those that are hurting more than I am.

So that’s what we’re going to do, TOGETHER!

I’ve started a GoFundMe campaign to provide a lifesaving surgery for a child in poverty overseas. I’d be so honored if you prayed for this precious child and donated a couple bucks. Share this post to get the word out!

The post A Dream, a Diagnosis, and an Advent appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

But sometimes all the gift giving seems silly, even a bit selfish.

What if the gifts you give to friends and family were also a gift to those hurting around the world?

World Vision has long been helping children in desperate poverty by providing them with sponsors who supply food, healthcare, education, and someone who truly loves them. In 2015, approximately 900 million people worldwide lived at or below the global poverty line (Defined as living on $1.90 or less a day. Yeah, you read that right.). The greatest concentration of those living in poverty are located in Sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia.

At Christmas time, World Vision gives folks a way to go above and beyond to help people in need. Their 21st annual World Vision Gift Catalog is full of more than 100 thoughtful, helpful gifts that you can give to the hurting. Meet practical needs like clean water, fruit trees, career training, backpacks, medical care, goats, chickens, textbooks, sewing machines and SO much more. Increased access to education, healthcare, housing, employment and personal security greatly increase a person’s chances of escaping poverty.

Take a look at the ways your small gift can radically change a real life. It will turn the mayhem of Christmas on its head. It will change you.

It is so cool to sit down with my kids and joyfully pick ways to GIVE. It’s really fun because you can give these gifts in honor of friends and family and they can receive a card to commemorate the gift. It’s wonderful to pair these meaningful gifts up with relatives. My boys picked out soccer balls for kids and gave in honor of their uncle who loves to kick the ball around with them.

And of course, we still want to give gifts TO our friends and family. World Vision has made those gifts extra meaningful too! You can give all sorts of handmade gifts to your friends that were made by people trying to get out of poverty. Your purchase of jewelry, household decor items, or handbags directly impact the artisans who made them, while giving your friends and family something gorgeous and tangible.

World Vision gave me some samples to show off to you. I think this bracelet is my favorite! It goes with EVERYTHING!

You can order online, over the phone (1-855-WV-GIFTS), or request a hard copy. And there’s something for everyone’s price point ($16 all the way up to shared gifts in the $40,000!). You can also just give to a fund to meet people’s most pressing needs under the category “Give Where It’s Needed Most“. Get your extended family involved. Get your church involved.

Make this Christmas a time of giving till it hurts and finding healing for ALL. 

World Vision provides assistance to people in nearly 100 countries to help eradicate poverty and provide hope around the world. Learn more about the mission of World Vision by watching this short movie. 

The post Christmas Gifts that Will Change the World appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

While this post makes me feel extremely vulnerable, I know that women with PPD are not the only ones struggling. Husbands are desperately trying to understand and help their wives navigate the murky waters of depression.

(Please consider sharing this article on social media. There are those who need to read this information but might not be seeking it out.)

My wife has said many shocking things to me.

“I’ve never seen ‘Last of the Mochicans'”. “I think we should move to Texas.” “I think we should only buy organic food from now on.” “You’re going skydiving for your birthday!”

And who could forget, “We’re pregnant.”

Yes, she’s full of surprises. But as I sat with my 5 month old son on my lap looking up at my gorgeous bride in her new role as a mother, I heard the most unexpected words pass over her lips. “I’ve thought about killing myself.”

I didn’t process the words at first. It was partly due to the child held in my lap screaming at the top of his lungs like he had been for the past 2 hours, but mostly I just couldn’t navigate the emotional path my wife had traveled from experiencing the first few months of parenthood to thoughts of suicide. True, our oldest was an exceptionally difficult baby, screaming his head off when he was awake and only sleeping for short increments, but there had been smiles too. We both adored our new son, and there had been many family members and close friends there to support us and lend a hand.

How could it have gotten to this point?

Probably the hardest part for a father (but plenty difficult for a mother too) is living with the effects of Postpartum Depression and not realizing it. I often found myself asking, “What am I doing wrong?”, or “What can I do to make her happy?”

If you’ve found yourself in a similar situation, first, I’m sorry. I know it’s painful, and frustrating but second, please allow me to disillusion you. You did not do this. Postpartum Depression is a clinical illness caused by the myriad of hormones that have overloaded your wife’s system for the last few months. (I know there are much more accurate medical explanations; bear with me) So be encouraged that this present darkness is not your doing.

Recognizing PPD in Your Wife

Recognizing the signs of PPD in your wife can be really tricky. Caring for a child is stressful, frustrating, and exhausting. The pressure will be the fuel for a few marital spats. Add to that a debilitating lack of sleep, and maybe a few more of these children pint-sized relationship assassins and its easy to see why it would be hard to draw the line between normal parenthood rigors and depression.

One of the things to look for are the “Calls for Help”. (Well that doesn’t sound too bad does it? “Call for help”, that’s like a damsel in distress searching for her gallant knight in shining armor. Right? Wrong.)

“Calls for help” in my limited experience, have been one of two things. An expression of debilitating hopelessness, or uncharacteristically biting, mean, comments.

It’s a nasty spiral. She was expecting to feel contentment and joy over her new baby. Instead she feels overwhelmed and out of control. Adding to this are all the changes that her body has just gone through during pregnancy and is continuing to go through after birth. Enter PPD. Instead of concluding that it is normal to feel overwhelmed and understandable to be discouraged at the difficulties, the PPD convinces her that she is the only mother that has felt like this.

That thought makes her feel incredibly guilty; both about her supposed shortcomings as a human being, and about her feelings toward her child, because, of course, in reality, she loves that adorable poop-machine. PPD has convinced her that this is never going to end. Life will always be like this now, and there is no way out. That’s the kicker. That’s what drives the situation from feeling bad into the realm of depression.

So, what will this sound like? Depression doesn’t always manifest itself as sadness, often times it looks like rage, or anxiety and worry. “I’m the worst mother ever!”, or “I can’t live like this.”, “What if I screw up and the baby dies” or “My child hates me.”  It is not her normal demeanor, and it usually seems like an over reaction to the situation. My wife would fixate on escaping her situation via drastic means like running away or suicide.

Women will often take out their feelings on their husbands. For instance, she may not be able to let the little things go. Small character flaws or habits that she doesn’t find particularly endearing will be extra grating now. Forgotten chores will set her off like they never would have before. PPD makes it so she has little capacity to deal with life and no patience or grace to cope with your shortcomings.

What Should You Do?

OK, you’re pretty sure it’s PPD, now what? Dads, please please please, don’t do what I did and get defensive. I understand the reaction. You have my every sympathy, but you need to take some time to understand what I’ve been telling you. She doesn’t feel like she can handle things in her life anymore. She feels like she isn’t able to do what is best for her child, and she thinks it’s never going to get better. Please do not make her feel like she is under attack from you too, her best source of empathy, and strength, and help.

What should you do?

First and most importantly, get help. Find a counselor, find a Psychologist, find a medical professional that is qualified to diagnose and help deal with this. It is not a cowardly response, it is not a shameful response, it is not a cop-out or a dismissal of another problem. Remember, you, neither of you, caused this, and neither of you can fix it by yourself, and it is not worth putting your family’s life or health on the line thinking that you can.

After that, Dads, get ready to be the big strong hero… by taking every verbal punch she may throw at you. You can take it, and now you are going to prove it. Also, be ready to serve her like crazy. Nothing is too unimportant, and nothing is beneath you. This is what being a Daddy is all about; putting yourself out there and being willing to hurt so your wife doesn’t have to.

Moms, I will never really know what you are going through and neither will your husband, so if I may humbly suggest it, I would advise you to seek out a mom that has gone through PPD before. She will be an invaluable source of hope to you and a real physical evidence that it does, in fact, get better.

I hope this has been helpful to your family. Please remember I am not a profession, I’m just a witness, and these are just guidelines and experiences that I have found helpful. 

Read more about our family’s journey through post partum depression.

The first round when I almost ended it all.

Getting PPD again and why I’m glad it happened.

The choice to have more kids after PPD.

The post What Husbands Need to Know about Post Partum Depression appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

The toys, the artwork, the trash that has become a treasure.

With kids, comes STUFF and lots of it!

The job of picking up is too big for one person. And you’ll be doing your kids a disservice in the long run if they don’t learn how to stay organized.

But have you ever seen a three year old stay focused on a task like picking up their toys???

I have.

It wasn’t always this way. It used to take an insane amount of time to get a Lego off the ground and into a bin. But things have changed around our house.

Here’s how we get our kids to pick up their toys quickly…

This post contains affiliate links for your convenience. Please read my full disclosure policy here. 

The Basic Concept:

Have a crate or box that is designated the “Toy Jail”. Warn your children when the toy jail is coming. Tell them they have a set amount of time to pick everything up and put it where it belongs. When the “toy jailer” comes through the room, any forgotten belongings will be place in the toy jail overnight.

The Results:

Wow. Wow. Wow. I can’t believe how much I like this system!

My oldest boys are 5 and almost 3. They both spring into action when they hear toy jail is coming. My oldest tries his very best to get everything and I mean EVERYTHING off the ground and safe from the big mean jailer. I don’t have to remind him to pick up the next thing and the next thing and the next. He’s totally self directed compared to a typical clean up session.

Adaptations, Tips and Tricks:

• Only do one or two rooms at a time. This keeps it from being an overwhelming cleaning session and it also makes a ten minute deadline doable.
• Have “Toy Jail” go through the house regularly. I try for every room once a day, or the high traffic rooms twice a day.
• Make toy storage SIMPLE! Kids will probably cause an even bigger mess if they don’t know where to put their toys once they get them off the floor. Nobody wants to find an old sippy cup under the bed! So make it obvious and make it simple. We love cubby shelving and storage bins. (This one is a Reading Nook with Cubbies that just looks SO inviting!) I label their bins with adorable chalkboard signs.
• Enforce the consequences. My three year old is not quite as impressed with the toy jail. Or at least, he’s figured out ways to avoid the work. He and his brother share a room and so when toy jail comes through, he stalls and lets his brother do all of the work. To remedy this, I asked my oldest to purposefully leave out a toy that clearly belongs to the three year old. When it inevitably was confiscated by the toy jail, he was shocked that I meant business. He takes more seriously now, but he still needs reminders.
• Make the “punishment” fit the age. I know that eventually my oldest won’t be too distraught about having a toy spend the night in jail. When that day comes, I plan on requiring the boys to “post bail” by doing a small chore around the house in order to win back their wayward toy.

Want MORE simple parenting hacks and advice? 

• Helping an Anxious Child Sleep
• Crippling Parenting Insecurities
• Helping Kids Stay Connected to their Out-of-Town Grandparents
• How to Spend Quality Time with Kids AND Get Stuff Done

The post How to Get Your Kids to Pick Up Their Toys Quickly appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

Are you parenting a child with Sensory Processing Disorder?

Welcome to the club!

Get ready for a wild ride!

You’re not alone as you navigate the tricky waters of SPD.

I’ve gathered some of the best articles around about being a sensory parent. From Sensory Parents to Sensory Parents.  You’ll be informed, challenged and encouraged. While they won’t solve your problems overnight, they’ll give you encouragement, confidence, and the hope you need to keep going.

What’s it like for other Sensory Processing Parents?

You’ll find yourself nodding along and feeling a little less alone when you read these mom’s stories of the realities of life with SPD.

We’re Not as Normal as We Look from My Mundane and Miraculous Life

Behind the Scenes of SPD: What Others Don’t See from Wendy Bertagnole

What SPD is to Me from Putting Socks on Chickens

What Does Sensory Processing Disorder REALLY Mean? from Lemon Lime Adventures

7 Things Sensory Processing Disorder has Taught Me from Putting Socks on Chickens

(Tired of being baffled by sensory behavior? Have a sensory activity to fit every need, situation and budget! Grab yourself some FREE printables and gain VIP access to blog articles by clicking here!)

How do I Discipline a Sensory Child?

Raising kids is hard enough. Not knowing if they can control their behavior or not? Super difficult. Find out how to still parent well and raise children with great character qualities. 

Parenting the Heart of a Sensory Child from My Mundane and Miraculous Life

Why Disciplining My Sensory Child is SO Hard from Integrated Learning Strategies

Is it Behavior or is it Sensory? from Growing Hands-On Kids

5 Ways to Make Parenting SPD Easier from Putting Socks on Chickens

How Can I Explain SPD to Others?

You’re not the only adult in your child’s life. They need as many people as possible to understand their needs so they have the best chance at success. 

How to Help Care Givers Understand SPD (A Printable Brochure) from My Mundane and Miraculous Life

How Can I Help My Family and Friends Understand My Child’s Behavior and Sensory Disorder? from Integrated Learning Strategies

Looking for Hope?

Will My Child Outgrow SPD? from My Mundane and Miraculous Life

Will My Sensory Child Be OK? Guest Post from an Adult with SPD on Lemon Lime Adventures

Need more??? Join this exclusive Facebook Support Group for Sensory Parents and get your questions answered!

Please take the opportunity to share and encourage other Sensory Parents in the comment section.

The post How to ROCK at Parenting a Child with SPD appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

This story is certainly not the simple birth story I expected to write. This story is still unfolding and I promise to write an update soon. Our family is already so thankful for the outpouring of love and prayers we’ve begun to receive!

(For an UPDATE on what we found out about our little guy, fast forward a year and read this.)

 But let me back up and tell you about how “Lovebug” was born in the first place…

Birth Story…

I’m not going to sugarcoat it. The last half of this pregnancy has been ROUGH. My hips have refused to work, leaving me dependent on canes, walkers, and the kindness of others.

Our birth center of choice hadn’t actually opened up yet, despite six months of promises. Their other location was available, but too far away to guarantee I’d make it there in time. (Hello, local news team! Why yes, I did just have this baby along the side of the road!)

I was stressed and in pain. There were so many unknowns.

Even in pregnancy I called Lovebug my most cooperative baby. He and I seemed to have a connection.

Every time I’d think to worry because I hadn’t felt him kick in a while, he’d move around within 30 seconds! Every. single. time.

He was every bit as cooperative in birth.

He waited to come until the birth center had been open two days. I had been saying all along that my best guess for his birthday would be the 20th, since my older two children had been born on Fridays closest to their due date. When I was feeling “off” on Friday morning, I asked my husband to stay home from work. When my soon-to-be middle child refused to nap, I asked my mom to take the older two boys to her house so I could get some sleep.

I’d been SO nervous about having a roadside baby because I only had eight minutes to spare with my last delivery. So I was hoping this time that the start of labor would be OBVIOUS.

Lovebug was cooperative again!

One swift kick woke me from my nap, with my water breaking and contractions starting immediately.

It was perfect. Husband was already home. Brothers were already at the grandparents. I had just had a nap!

The gifts just kept coming.

On our way to the birth center, the on-call midwife made contact with us. I was shocked to hear the voice of the same midwife who had delivered Lumpy, my absolute favorite! She wasn’t even supposed to work at the new location, but because of all the special accommodation for me, she happened to be our gal.

I started to cry happy tears right there. It was such a sign that God was right there with me, easing my fears.

When we arrived at the birth center, we quickly settled in. However, I was none too pleased when I found out I was only 3cm dilated. (My first birth had taken over 28 hrs and forced me to face my fear of death!)

At that point, I hissed to my husband, “Why do I keep trying this stupid natural birth thing!” 

10-15 minutes later, they were checking my progress again. Contractions were nearly a minute and a half long and barely two minutes apart (hardly any down time). I was at 7cm and already wanting to push.

I didn’t realize that a water birth was an option with my water breaking and all, but I gladly accepted the offer.

As I climbed into the tub as large as my bed, I had a contraction and settled in to start pushing. Unfortunately, the tub was so massive that my feet couldn’t reach the far side and I felt like I could slip under and drown! Andy leaned over the expanse, holding me under the arm pits.

Pushing feels good in a awful sort of way. It’s the most primal I have ever felt. The growling screams coming out of my throat scared even me!

About three contractions and his head was out. In my confusion, I panicked at the thought of his head underwater. But everyone assured me to wait for the next contraction to push his shoulders out. That hurt worse than crowning. He had come so fast that he presented transverse, meaning sideways! So those shoulders pretty much wrecked my tailbone, ouch!

The whole labor was one hour and twenty minutes, start to finish. Crazy!

I’ll always remember the weight and warmth of him as they placed my son on my chest. Perfect.

Birthmarks…

After climbing out of the tub and flopping onto the nice warm bed, I started to inspect my new child up close. He looked liked he’d been in a bar fight. But all my boys looked like that moments after birth. It wasn’t until about 15 minutes later that my midwife first mentioned the “bruise” I saw on his eyelid and forehead.

“It could be a birthmark. We’ll know soon.”

I was incredulous. My son’s flawless, lady!

But soon after, she confirmed that our little boy has a permanent birthmark covering a good chunk of his face.

I felt so shallow, but I cried anyway.

How would this affect him? The phrase, “A face only a Mother could love.” kept taunting me.

Nobody wants their child to be judged or excluded before they’re even known and that was my huge worry.

Or what I THOUGHT was my huge worry.

A couple days passed and then I received a random Facebook message that rocked my world.

A gal I barely know, told me that because of the type and location of my boy’s birthmark, he could be at risk for glaucoma and a syndrome called Sturge Weber.

Good ole Google told me a bit about SWS. I saw words jumping off the page like “seizures”, “mental retardation”, “physical handicaps”, and “progressive brain atrophy”, each phrase a new icy finger of terror gripping my heart.

I started sobbing uncontrollably as I told my husband the horrifying possibilities. That night was one of the worst nights of sleep I’ve ever gotten, and trust me, I’ve had some bad ones! My mind would not shut off. I honestly contemplated taking him to the ER in the middle of the night to get a brain scan done. I could not stand the thought of not knowing.

So does my precious son have Sturge Weber Syndrome?

I don’t know yet.

Why write this post now, pulling you into my world of unknowns? I debated for a long time about when to write this post, before or after test results came back.

But this story, our story, isn’t really about test results. It’s about a covenant.

A Covenant…

Not exactly a word used much in today’s culture. But it’s at the forefront of my mind right now.

I’ve always heard that God has made promises to us. But I’d always feared taking Scripture out of context, applying words to myself that were really meant for the original audience of the Bible.

I found myself believing that most of God’s promises had loopholes and fine print. I couldn’t really trust and rely on much of anything beyond basic salvation.

Then I started studying covenants.

The God of the Universe is in a covenant with me. One that He initiated. One that He has been steering all of history towards. One that was sealed with His blood. One that He is incapable of breaking. One that I can’t do anything to screw up or make void.

And what are the terms of this covenant?

I bring my filthy rags, He brings flawless righteousness. (Isaiah 64:6)

I trade a sin riddled heart, He gives me His. (Jeremiah 17:9)

I die to myself, He lives life abundantly in me. (Galatians 2:20)

The external becomes internal. The impossible becomes reality. (Jeremiah 31:33)

Forgiveness, Life, and God’s unrelenting favor (Jeremiah 32:41) because He has united Himself to me in this glorious covenant.

I can’t possibly pack all that God has promised to me into a couple paragraphs. But the gist of it is this.

He wants to shower me with good, real good. And He’s faithful and more than capable to do it.

It’s as good as done.

So where does my son play into all of this?

It’ll be easy to see God’s goodness if my son doesn’t have Sturge Weber, and we pray to that end.

But if he does…

God knows all and has everything under His authority. He has also PROMISED to do nothing but good to me. It might be incredibly painful, but it will be best. Having a son with SWS will be the best gift, the better gift.

I’m a parent. Every day my children and I disagree on the definition of “good”. They think it’s mounds of candy and never-ending TV. I have slightly more perspective.

Sometimes I insist they go through something hard; something that can’t possibly see the benefit of.

God may be asking me to do something similar. I don’t know.

So as I wait, I can truly find a “peace that surpasses all understanding”. Not because I have faith in a positive outcome, but because I have faith in the covenant God.

(Welp, it’s been a year. Read this to get the update!)

The post Birthmarks, Birth Stories, and a Covenant appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

So much fun and chaos gets packed into one month. And the awe and wonder of the incarnation, God becoming man for us, can get lost in the shuffle.

These Christmas Nativity activities are a great way to refocus and open up discussion with your kids about the true meaning of Christmas.

Enjoy, and MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Nativity Sets

* Small World Nativity Play by Sun Hats and Wellie Boots

* Lego Nativity Set by Frugal Fun for Boys

* Use Toilet Paper Rolls to Make a Nativity Set by Happy Hooligans

Make Wise Men with Shampoo Bottles by No Time for Flash Cards

Small World Nativity Play by The Imagination Tree

Manger Figurines by Mama’s Happy Hive

* Felt Nativity Scene by Mama Smiles

Ornaments

Jesus in the Manger Ornament by Something 2 Offer

Baby Jesus Ornament Made with an Envelope by Mrs. Jones’ Creation Station

* Lighted Nativity Ornament by I Can Teach My Child

Kid-Made Nativity Ornament by Mom Inspired Life

Printable Worksheets

Free Printable Nativity Preschool Worksheet by Learning 2 Walk

Free Printable Nativity Pre-K/K Worksheets by This Reading Mama

Other Crafts and Activities 

* Stars and Angels Mobile by Mama’s Happy Hive

* Stain Glass Nativity Craft by Housing a Forest

Nativity Tree by Sun Hats and Wellie Boots

* And Another Nativity Tree by Sun Hats and Wellie Boots

Draw the Nativity with Geometric Shapes by Mama Smiles

* LEGO Nativity Puzzles by I Can Teach My Child

Make a Christmas Story Bracelet by Adventures in Mommydom

Nativity Memory Game by My Joy-Filled Life

The post Christmas Nativity Activities for Kids appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

I can’t be the only mother who worries that her toddler is going to end up robbing banks!

When I see my children miss behave, I’m always concerned that it will become a habit. And as we all know, habits are no fun to break.

But lately we’ve been in a rut of only correcting bad choices, not really instilling anything positive. My kids are so young, I wasn’t sure where to start. But I knew I needed them to start maturing, so our lives weren’t one chaotic moment after another. The Dream of a Smooth Life 

When a friend of mine came back from a homeschooling conference, she was stoked about a speaker she had heard. The gal had explained the value of instilling good habits in children. The more wonderful habits, the more “smooth” a typical day would go. Imagine a life where your children were habitually obedient, neat, and kind.

Yeah, that’d be swell.

But it’s pretty much the opposite of our reality right now. How in the world can you work towards those habits.

Enter one of my heroines, Charlotte Mason.

Mason wrote extensively about the value of training our children to have good habits. However, she never wrote a book exclusively about habits. Lucky for us, the book Laying down the Rails : A Charlotte Mason Habits Handbook compiles all of Mason’s quotes about said habits into a well organized book.

There are three sections, all meant for parents.

First, the rational behind habit training.

I’ve gotta admit, the Type B personality in me bristled at the idea of habits. I don’t want robotic kids. I want their hearts to desire all these good character traits. But as I read Mason’s logic, it became clear that the goal IS genuine heart change but that everything becomes a habit, both good and bad, so we might as well be striving for those good habits.

Take the habit of truthfulness for example.

Do I want my children to LOVE truth and see the beauty of a transparent life? Yes! Is that a practical expectation for a three year old? No. But, can a three year old develop a bad habit of lying that will make the first goal even harder to achieve? Unfortunately, yes. Hence the need for instilling GOOD habits.

The main section of the book covers each habit in great detail, of which there are nearly 50! Mason had a lot of wisdom to share about each trait. There are definitely quite a few areas where I was convicted of my short-fallings.

The last section addresses how to correct bad habits, based on specific issues like tantrums, dawdling, and lying. It’s incredibly thorough and helpful.

Making Things Down to Earth…

After reading Laying down the Rails : A Charlotte Mason Habits Handbook, I was convinced that I needed to start working on instilling these habits in my kids.

But I was overwhelmed. 

Where to start? What methods to use? Can this even be done?

That’s where this second book comes to the rescue! Laying Down the Rails for Children: A Habit-training Companion is where the rubber meets the road. In it, parents are encouraged to pick one habit to work on for 6-8 weeks. Each habit has 12 corresponding lessons. Some of the lessons are poems or short stories, highlighting the habit in action. Others are discussion starters or even games!

I love that at the beginning start of each habit, there’s a place for parents to write out their goals, celebration ideas, even personal stories they’d like to share. They encourage starting each new habit training with a family meeting so everyone is on the same page and excited to ALL grow in that particular area.

We started with obedience. I can’t tell you how helpful it was to officially discuss how to handle our son’s disagreement in a respectful way. Instead of saying “but” to everything I say, he’s getting better at saying “Can I share my thoughts?”BIG DIFFERENCE! He also has to stop sharing those thoughts once we’ve said, “I’ve made my decision.” He then has to respond quickly, cheerfully and without delay.

While we’ve only implemented one habit so far, I’m thrilled to have a proactive way to instill character in my kids. They’re excited too and love having a say in family meetings. We’re all being heard and we’re headed in the right direction; building kids’ character.

(To save money, consider getting the books in a bundle here.)

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The post How to be Proactive and Intentional about Building Kids’ Character appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

There I was, a grown woman sitting crossed-legged on the floor with a Bible in my lap.

I’d grown up immersed in this Bible. My parents were solid Christians. I went to church, well, religiously.

I was a Bible quiz champion, a church camp counselor, a Biblical Studies major, and eventually a church planter/missionary.

But in that moment, alone in my brother’s room, I rejected everything I’d built my life upon. I looked at those ancient words in utter disbelief and declared (to whom, I don’t know) “There is no God.”

This was not my first crisis of faith…

All sorts of different things have trigger my doubts. Everything from an Astronomy class lecture, to a cute boy I really wanted to date. Sometimes it’s an aspect about the God of the Bible that really rubs me the wrong way. Other times it’s life circumstances that make me question the idea that there’s truly an all-good, all-powerful God.

These doubts have had a way of throwing me into a tailspin. My entire view of the world would be called into question and I could’t just ignore it.

Depression would usually follow.

I have felt that truth is impossible to find, or maybe even non-existent. Who to trust? Everyone lies or bends facts. I couldn’t even trust myself. I knew my own thoughts and desires were easily corrupted and biased.

I felt trapped and unable to cope with life. The only escape hatch seemed to be an existential black hole of isolation, not trusting anyone, even my own reason and experience.

Yet, every time I wanted to jump reality’s ship, I felt like it was a coward’s way out and it would never satisfy.

Eventually I’d get the courage to examine the facts again. I’d ask myself, “What do I KNOW?”

Like, undeniable, bare bones facts. No presuppositions. No unfounded assumptions.

I was always left with two truths that I couldn’t deny, though I desperately wanted to.

1. Someone/Something more powerful than me designed the universe.
2. There was a real person who lived, died, and came back to life.

Now, I know you may not believe these two things, but in the weeks to come, I want to share with you just some of the facts I have to back those two claims up.

They’re so overwhelming to me that I’d have to be intellectually dishonest WITH MYSELF to deny them. (And trust me, I’ve wanted to.) So before I go rattling off facts, I want you to know that I’ve felt the anger, the fear, and the despair. I’ve tried to wiggle away from my eventual conclusions, but I just can’t seem to do.

Another crisis of faith will probably come my way sooner or later. I’ll want to run away from everything I’ve believed.

But I’m starting to get wise in my old age…

I know that these two pillars of truth will hem me in. And on the foundation of those two undeniable facts, there has been built an incredible wealth of truth that anchors my soul in the worst tempests.

So here’s what this series will cover…

• Evidence for an Intelligent Creator
• Evidence for the Life, Death and Resurrection of the person Jesus
• Should the Bible be trusted to give insight into these first two facts?
• So what DO I believe?

This is MY way of processing and may not be yours. But please don’t ever think Christianity is an unreasonable belief or a blind faith. We are to love the God of the Bible with all our MINDS! Truth can stand up to questions.

But be ready.

The answers won’t allow us to be indifferent, they demand a response.

Will you get up off the floor and join me in this journey?

The post The Skeptic’s Guide to Faith appeared first on My Mundane and Miraculous Life.

When I was a kid, all the way through middle school, I wanted to have 12 kids. TWELVE!

I had their names all picked out. (Why yes I wanted quadruplets named Faith, Hope, Joy and Grace!) I’d decided how I wanted to space them apart age wise. I even researched vehicles that could haul a troupe that big.

It probably wasn’t until high school that bits of reality started to break through my day dreams. I decided five kids was the perfect number. I have an flawless line of reasoning behind this number, but I’ll spare you the details.

Even when I got married, I adamantly  stuck to the number five. Granted, I never convinced my husband to get on board, but whatever.

Then I had my first child. 

Now, I don’t consider myself a fool. I knew kids were a lot of work!

But my child broke the mold when it comes to being fussy. And if you know my story, many, many other factors contributed to my eventual descent into severe post partum depression.

By the grace of God, I survived that season. It was torture, plain and simple and I never wanted to go through it again.

Oh, except that I wanted more kids…

I had extreme PPD with my first child. We choose to have another child and I went through it again, though less severe. I even wrote a post called “Why I’m GLAD I went through PPD again”.  Now we’re getting ready to welcome our third son!

But he will be our last planned biological child. 

Here’s what we considered when we thought about adding child number two and three…

Thoughts to Ponder

The Bad News

Getting PPD Again is Quite Likely

While it’s not a given, you’re chances of getting PPD again are more likely than someone who has never experienced it.  Some factors that can lead to depression are probably still true the second time around, like a family history of depression. The American Psychological Association estimates the chances of getting PPD for the first time at 9-16% while the likely hood of getting it a second time increase to 41%. Unfortunately in this case, lightning really can strike twice.

It will Feel Just as Real

I’ve had PPD twice now. Before having my second child, I thought my depressive thoughts would be obvious this time around, like I’d know they were intruders or something! Well, they actually felt just as real, just as overwhelming and hopeless. The intensity didn’t lessen. So don’t underestimate the fury, anxiety and other feelings you’ll experience a second time around.

Going through PPD Again may be More Stressful with More Children to Care For

When you have post partum depression with your first child, only an infant sees you at your worst (which is bad enough). But when you’re on subsequent children, their older siblings are watching you have meltdowns and adding to your stress. The older child may not understand the powerful emotions running through their mother and that can have an ill effect. And along those same lines…

Depression Effects More than just the Mother

I’m not sure who went through more turmoil, myself or my husband. Watching me fall apart and threaten suicide daily could not have been an easy road to journey. My husband had to bear a burden much larger than most. Choosing to have another child effects your partner almost as much as it effects you, so take their feelings seriously.

The Good News

You Know the Signs 

You know what to look for and you’re not going to be blindsided this time! Please don’t waste time in a state of denial. It only makes things worse. (Keep other people in the know about your typical symptoms so they can intervene as well!)

You Learned Battle Strategies 

Practice makes perfect, right? You have fought through some pretty icky stuff once before and you’re stronger for it. You probably know your triggers. You probably know some calming techniques. You’ve learned that you cannot let thoughts and feelings dominate you and you know how to preach truth to yourself.

You Can Get Support from the very Beginning

I pray you have a team of people who know and love you, cheering you on! They are an invaluable resource. Let them in. Be vulnerable and share your previous story and ask them to help you as you go through those murky waters again. Before I had my second son, I shared this very story on my personal Facebook page and with the leadership at my church. I was new to the area and knew I had to get real with people quickly and ask for help. PPD is NOT something to fight alone.

You Now Know There’s Hope

This made the biggest difference for me! In my first bout with PPD, I could. not. imagine. EVER being happy again. I thought my life was broken beyond repair. I truly couldn’t even daydream up a magical scenario that would make things right again. But yet, there is One who brings life to the lifeless and hope to the hopeless. Now that I’ve experience that “There and Back Again” roller coaster, I’m far more confident that life will return to “normalcy”. Again, the feelings are still just as intense, but I can battle those with the reality that I’ve lived through them once and seen them disappear before.

Sorry, I’m not going to tell you if you should have more children. It’s a complicated beast.

We decided to have to more, but the dream of five… well, it’s just too much for my reality.

Please take post partum depression seriously and consider what is best for your family! I wish you all the best!

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